The Petra Zone

Bob turns into the next George Lucas!!!! hahahaha!


We now get the "Special Edition" videos. You know the ones where the technology wasn't up to snuff when they shot them originally, but now now have all kinds of extras....like....wait for it....you knew it was coming...


1. Citas now with Super CGI of Greg X. Voltz doing Matrix style flips and kicks!

2. Ronny Cates running around stage (Now with hyperspace lines like Star Wars.

3. The alternate ending to the Beyond Belief video where the kid finally recognizes that members of Petra have been mysteriously "Helping" him all day. He files a restraining order against Petra after they keep telling him, "Thanks for all your support on Beyond Belief. We have a new project that we would love to tell you about but we would have to KILL you!

4. As the Elephantes tease Bob in Back Stage Pass about the inlays on his guitar, the inlays become 3D wrap around the the Elephantes until they apologize.

5. New totally CGI member of Petra named Gar Gar Jinks.

6. All hair restoration is now CGI.

7. It's revealed that all the members of Petra over the years have been clones.

8. Shocker!!! Greg X. Voltz is John Schlitt's father!!!!

9. Scene from Beyond Belief video where kid gets angry and drives all day is replaced with totally CGI Podrace.

10. John Schlitt sways from side to side in never before released footage, clenches fist and sings WHOA!!!! for first time. Then turns to R2D2 and says "Yippee!!! That's a good move."

11. Bob goes back and starts making "Prequel" praise albums, instead of Petra Praise 4.

12. Cartoon Spinoff... Mighty Morphin Petra Rangers!!!

13. Feeling bad for Greg Bailey and Paul Simmons, CGI is used to insert them into both the Beyond Belief and Backstage Pass videos.

14. Missing live versions of Lord I lift your name, and Judas Kiss are released after 10 years in a box set with Washes White Than. Fans buy it right away for the two never before released songs!!! After purchase, consumers discover that the songs have been changed with CGI!!! Then we are told we will never hear the originals again, only to be re-released 3 years later in another box set of Washes Whiter Than...

Enosh, you are so funny.

Hahaha! That's great, I loved it!

1. Citas now with Super CGI of Greg X. Voltz doing Matrix style flips and kicks!

I can TOTALLY see GXV doing that! LOL

2. Ronny Cates running around stage (Now with hyperspace lines like Star Wars.

LMBO, that's AWESOME!

3. The alternate ending to the Beyond Belief video where the kid finally recognizes that members of Petra have been mysteriously "Helping" him all day. He files a restraining order against Petra after they keep telling him, "Thanks for all your support on Beyond Belief. We have a new project that we would love to tell you about but we would have to KILL you!

LOLOLOL

4. As the Elephantes tease Bob in Back Stage Pass about the inlays on his guitar, the inlays become 3D wrap around the the Elephantes until they apologize.

Nobody talks about Bob's inlays that way and gets away with it!

5. New totally CGI member of Petra named Gar Gar Jinks.

I dunno about this one *scratches head*

6. All hair restoration is now CGI.

Oh, my!

7. It's revealed that all the members of Petra over the years have been clones.

Hey, I want my own personal Petra clones!

8. Shocker!!! Greg X. Voltz is John Schlitt's father!!!!

Yikes!

9. Scene from Beyond Belief video where kid gets angry and drives all day is replaced with totally CGI Podrace.

Yeah! That would be sooo RAD!

10. John Schlitt sways from side to side in never before released footage, clenches fist and sings WHOA!!!! for first time. Then turns to R2D2 and says "Yippee!!! That's a good move."

LOL

11. Bob goes back and starts making "Prequel" praise albums, instead of Petra Praise 4.

This has gotta be the best one!

12. Cartoon Spinoff... Mighty Morphin Petra Rangers!!!

I'd get up early on Saturday mornings for this...and go back to bed when it's over...only I wouldn't be able to sleep, cuz I'd be thinking about it too much.

13. Feeling bad for Greg Bailey and Paul Simmons, CGI is used to insert them into both the Beyond Belief and Backstage Pass videos.

Thank God for CGI...wouldn't want Greg and Paul feeling bad.

14. Missing live versions of Lord I lift your name, and Judas Kiss are released after 10 years in a box set with Washes White Than. Fans buy it right away for the two never before released songs!!! After purchase, consumers discover that the songs have been changed with CGI!!! Then we are told we will never hear the originals again, only to be re-released 3 years later in another box set of Washes Whiter Than...

Is it just me, or does this idea sound not that far-fetched?



Got anymore?????

15. John Lawry was actually an orphan on Tatooine before he came to America.

16. Gar Gar Jinks shot Paul Simmons' drum set with a blaster and was thereby excommunicated from the band.

17. Greg X. Volz has a southern drawl.

18. Wookies know how to play electric guitar?!?

19. Those cream puffs I ate the other day came back up. It wasn't too pretty.

20. Prequel praise albums are now available!! Petra Praise -1: The Empire Cries Out and Petra Praise -2: We Need Some Blasters to Get These Dumb Troopers Off Our Backs are on sale as a two-CD pack for only $-3.95! Order it today and receive a bag of salted peanuts for free!