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BE HAPPY

Posted: Mon Sep 20, 2004 10:27 pm
by Pethead1
1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?

Unique Up On It.



2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?

Tame Way, Unique Up On It.



3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?

They Take The Psycho Path



4. How Do You Get Holy Water?

You Boil The Hell Out Of It.



5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?

Dam!



6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?

Polaroid's



7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?

A Stick



8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?

Nacho Cheese.



9. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?

Subordinate Clauses.



10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?

Quattro Sinko..



11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?

Spoiled Milk.



12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?

Frostbite.



13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?

A Nervous Wreck.



14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?

Anyone Can R oast Beef.



15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?

Right Where You Left Him.



26. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?

Because They Have Big Fingers.



17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?

Because It Scares The Dog.



18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?

Sanka.



19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?

The Location Of The Dirt Bag.



20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?

Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.



21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?

A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!

A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.



22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?

Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer


Image

that was soooooo not lame!

Posted: Tue Sep 21, 2004 4:54 pm
by seichu kaisho
23. What is the punch line of this joke?

Too long; I need to wait a few minutes to refill.


24. Hey, are you on the computer right now?

No, I'm in front of it.

Ha

Posted: Wed Sep 22, 2004 4:57 am
by Petrafan4life79
You guys crack me up! :lol:

convention

Posted: Wed Sep 22, 2004 6:55 am
by Michael
It's like a Laffy Taffy convention.

more midnight slide oil to burn!

Posted: Wed Sep 22, 2004 9:31 am
by seichu kaisho
I should look on the web for trombone jokes so I can share them on here.
One of them I remember:

How do you make a trombone sound like a French horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play really bad.

Posted: Thu Sep 23, 2004 1:27 am
by SamScales
hehehe, they are funny. Wish I could remember them to use them in my concerts........

Not an original of mine

Posted: Thu Sep 23, 2004 5:06 pm
by seichu kaisho
I suppose you've all heard this joke but I'll share it anyway.

What's on the TV tonight?
The antenna.

Posted: Sat Sep 25, 2004 7:40 pm
by Petrapraise
badump bump

this one

Posted: Sat Oct 09, 2004 11:09 pm
by seichu kaisho
Ooh ooh ooh! :idea:

What's another name for old, hardened slide oil on a trombone?

Ancient grease